Wednesday, March 8, 2017

Good Riddance

Dear You,
Despite all the pain you caused me, I'm still very thankful that sometime in my life I was able to know you. I could have cursed you, wish you all the bad things in life but then I realized, it's not worth it. Thanks to Bo Sanchez's Heart Detox and I was able to apply The Gap. Hurtful words cannot be taken back once said and I don't want to suffer the burden of resentment for the rest of my life. Now I'm choosing to do good and just be thankful that we were having will not go on any further. It wasn't a healthy relationship after all. Neither of us is proud of our identities and we can't even express it in public. We've been talking for hours yet I can't even reveal to my roommate who I'm talking to. The fear of revelation is always there and I'm not comfortable with it anymore.As far as I can remember, that is not the kind of relationship that I ever wanted. I've been wanting something that is real and genuine and pure. Something that I can be proud to everybody because ever since I've always loved the teasing that I get from my friends. I've been praying for someone who is mature and responsible. Someone who has a clear goal in life. Someone who would inspire me to serve the Lord more. Maybe I was blinded by your acts of interest because it's been a long time since a man exclusively calls me. However, later did I know that it wasn't exclusive after all. You clearly have mastered your scheduling skills and somehow I found out that I'm not your priority. You will only call me because you are bored and got no one to talk to or perhaps your OTHER talkmate is already sleeping or not available. Unfortunately, I'm just your fallback girl and I don't want you to treat me that way anymore. Many times I tried to block you in my contact list but I just cant. Then came a time that you just stopped calling. To be honest, I wasn't ready for it. There's confusion, anger, worry all combined together. I'm hurt and I want vengeance. But then again, isn't it the very thing that I wished for? This is it, I could finally get rid of your presence. My absence in your life won't matter anymore and I know that you will just be fine. You will eventually get to know some other fallback girls but for me it's over. It isn't going to be that easy for sure but as the days pass by, I'm getting used to it and eventually I could finally say GOOD RIDDANCE! You will be fine, -niceurdaneta-